hisheartsdesire | [ic] Contact

I get it, you just want to be sure.

[No really, he gets it. She still doesn't trust him, and why should she?]

He's already something else.
Maybe that's why he won't turn.
Now that I think about it, I don't know how it works with imPorts.

Edited 2015-09-28 05:14 (UTC)

i dont want anyone getting hurt thats all
im sorry for being so blunt tobias
have you fed from many imports?

It's fine. [It isn't, really.]
Only three.
Dorian and two other breeds of immortals.
The one I'm with now and Dorian volunteer their blood.
And I have to negotiate deals with the other if I want his.
I try to do that sparingly since the mess back at your place.

negotiate deals? that sounds

[ Shady? ]

is this person trustworthy themselves?

[Dammit, how is he supposed to answer this?]

If I'm to be perfectly honest, then the answer is that I don't really know.
Things with him are somewhat complicated.
But he's not all bad. And sometimes accidents happen.
I'm really sorry about the mess back then, by the way.
It would've made much more sense if I'd taken it outside.
Bad judgment call on my part.

[He wonders why he's still apologizing when he doesn't live with them, and they made it perfectly clear that he's the problem. Hearing anything sketchy about anyone else involved only continues to build their case against him.]

[ Hang on a second. She's slowly putting two and two together. ]

tobias did that person you made a deal with do that back then

[ Was there someone else in the house then? ]

He didn't do it on purpose.
It happened on our way out.

what happened?

[He is so ashamed.]

The deal I made was that I got to feed in exchange for him to use some magic on me.
The magic didn't quite work out the way he'd expected, I think.
I died.
He couldn't just leave me there for you two to deal with.
So I think most of the mess was from him trying to get me out of the house.

[ Well, that's terrifying. ]

he killed you in our own house??

I'm almost certain it wasn't on purpose!
It's not like he'd planned on that happening.

[So far as he knows, that is. He's not really sure what to make of his relationship with Abdu—Matthew.]

that doesnt sound good
what if it happens again?
are you okay after all that?

[ How on earth does the whole resurrection deal work in this world? She doesn't want to find out personally. ]

I'll decline any other deals of the sort.
It's not going to happen again.

i am sorry all that happened to you
or that laurie and i didnt notice

[ She feels guilty that someone died right under her nose. Maybe she could have done something to prevent it. ]

[Maybe he's being self-pitying again, but he feels really down and out right now. He's even run out on Dorian, only to realize that Dorian had been perfectly faithful. And that Dorian isn't angry, which he perhaps should be. So, Toby's taking everything out on himself.]

No, you're all right.
I'm the one who should be sorry for not knowing other, more acceptable ways to deal with the hand I've been dealt.
Putting everyone in risk every time I do something as routine as feeding.
Laurie was right to tell me to go.

doesnt the hospital offer blood? does it not help?

Blood will only nourish me if taken fresh within a certain period of time.
Which is why the fresh blood banks at hospitals don't work.
Who would they ask for blood donations to give someone like me?
They can't ask their patients for something like that.
And I imagine whoever they do ask for blood probably would get spooked finding out it's going to a vampire.
People don't seem to understand when I say that I've tried as many alternatives as possible over the course of hundreds of years.
It's as if I haven't been trying hard enough, despite the fact that I've had years and years to try and keep trying.
There really is no simple solution to this sort of thing.
Do you want me to list all the things I've already tried at this point?

sorry i dont mean to disregard your efforts
i suppose animal blood doesnt work at all

No, it doesn't work.
Feeding from other immortals does seem to work.
I've never tried to feed on imPorts who aren't immortal.
And with the magic or whatever happened to me, I wouldn't be able to without obtaining clear and informed consent anyway.

do you mean you have to ask people?

Well, the three I feed from now already knew from the start.
But I think the simple answer is yes, I'll have to ask people.
Probably have to answer all their questions satisfactorily before the magic allows me to feed.
That's what I'm guessing because I haven't really tried it yet.
Though now I think it's in everyone's best interests if I'm thorough to begin with.

maybe
that reminds me do you know other vampires here who could help you?
theres kanaya

We might be different types.
Ms. Maryam seems perfectly capable of sustaining herself with the synthetics.
And I don't think she actually burns up in sunlight.
As things are, she's already taking care of the fledglings I sired.
I'm the reason they're on her hands now.
She has a rather low opinion of me, regardless of my efforts to improve anything.

different types of vampire i see
you cant ask her for help?

I don't know. Our past interactions have been anything but pleasant.
She distrusts me and has shown little to no faith in my ability to change.
I tried to prove myself once by taking care of one of the fledglings.
And she took that one away from me after deeming me and my company inappropriate.
It's as if asking anything of her is a request to be spoonfed.
I have no idea how to approach her, let alone what sort of help to ask for.

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