hisheartsdesire | [ic] Contact

[A familiar voice cuts through the lingering pain of that memory; his eyes seem to focus, trying to see through the haze of his tears. He blinks, his expression contemplative as he tries to pick out that voice because it clearly isn't Dorian's. Then, he stops hugging himself and instead wipes his face before noticing someone sitting before him, someone who still isn't Dorian.]

Abdu—no. Matthew.

[Slowly, it comes back to him. What they were doing, the reason they're even here, Toby remembers it all now. But that doesn't stop the pain still stinging, still echoing in his heart and mind now that it's done. With a sniffle, he tries to compose himself and, with some effort, manages to sit up so that he and the demon are facing one another.

Some part of him is shocked and appalled Abduxel found that one; another part thinks he should've known the demon would specifically choose that one. After all, Abduxel seems to want nothing more than to take Dorian, and Toby happens to be standing in his way, and so he takes pleasure in making Toby miserable.

What does Dorian mean to... this monster?

Gradually, his breathing starts to stabilize, and he comments,]

Well... [He clears his throat and takes a deep breath. His voice sounds bitter, his body language is guarded, and he rolls his eyes as he continues,] You... must be... ecstatic now, after finding that one.

[So, why doesn't he look all that thrilled?]

[He doesn't say anything in return, at first, idly running his fingers over the charred line of blood on his own arm. He's not going to answer that question directly. After a moment, he says slowly,]

I understand you better.

[Now that he's more aware of reality and his surroundings, Toby notes there's a gunpowder-y smell in the air and knows that, much like his own blood on the mirror when summoning Abduxel, the demon's blood had baked when he took the memory. His gaze goes to Abduxel's arm, notes the crusty, dark line over the large gash, and then drops to the ground and glances at nothing in particular. Abduxel seems strangely silent, and Toby doesn't know what to make of this unexpected reaction.

His gaze goes to the demon's face when he finally speaks, and Toby's eyes narrow as his brows knit in confusion. How could he possibly understand? he thinks, and yet some part of him wants to believe that he's somehow connected with the demon.

But he still can't help feeling wary; there's a mix of defensiveness and suspicion in his voice.]

Oh, really now? Is that what you think?

[Abduxel gives him a look.]

It's what I know. If you're not aware, I feel everything - everything that you do. When we're doing that.

[He sighs a sort of rueful laugh, shaking his head.]

That was... phew. So much worse than the way I died.

[Toby unknowingly shrinks back and drops his gaze when Abduxel gives him that look. When the demon finishes talking, he really doesn't know what to say. At least he somehow connected with Abduxel, but... it was something so personal, finally facing his fears and himself in that particular way. And, of course, with Dorian there to assure him, comfort him, love him, and most of all, respect his decision after all that.

Though he continues looking at the ground, his expression softens as he gives a small shrug.]

Not that I'd know, but I really would much rather not trade notes.

[He chuckles softly, the tension slowly melting away, and then he sighs.]

...care for a drink? It's on me.

Are you sure? I could show you. It would be nothing after that.

[It's hard to tell if he's serious, but suddenly he's reaching out to wipe a tear from Toby's cheek. Just briefly - the touch doesn't linger - although of course Toby is free to dodge or swat him away.]

Sure, a drink sounds great. I think we both need one.

[His eyes widen when Abduxel reaches out to him; his heart races, but he doesn't flinch or pull away. His cheek feels unnaturally cold, as vampire skin is wont to, but not icy or frigid. It's probably nice in the Florida heat and humidity.

He swallows, and then shakes his head.]

I'm sure. Please, I'd rather not. [Seems he's had enough for the evening.] Can we just... go? For drinks, please?

Yeah, let's go. Have a place in mind, Tobias?

[He stands then, straightening out his suit and dusting off his butt, since he sat on the ground in it.]

I do know a few in the area. [He also gets up and brushes himself off, namely the side on which he'd toppled over earlier.] But I didn't have anywhere specific in mind—any preferences?

Yeah, I think I know a bar that's walkable from here. That's about all that matters, isn't it?

[He starts to lead them the correct direction. After an awkward pause,]

Well, we're square now.

Yeah...

[And Toby follows, resigning himself to his confusion and allowing them to lapse into a stiff silence.

So when Abduxel speaks, Toby nods in agreement before letting out a sigh of relief.]

So, that settles it. I'm glad to call it even. [A beat.] And... it's fine if you call me Toby, by the way.

[He turns a small, amused smile towards Toby as they walk.]

Does that mean we're friends now? You have strange criteria for friendship.

I don't know, I just—

[He shrugs, and it's clear from his expression he's still boggling over Abduxel suddenly being nice.]

I guess I thought that this might be what all your other friendships might be like. It's not as if I really know anything about you.

[He laughs with an open grin, winking after he says:] You must be baffled how I have friends at all, if that's the case.

[The demon manages to tease a small smile out of Toby.]

Well, surely you've some sort of demonic charisma that draws people close regardless of how you treat them.

It's my ethereal good looks, actually.

You know, you're not like any vampire I've met.

[And now, a curious look.]

Wh—well, what makes you say that?

[Why, do they all fall putty into his lap, or do all of them just hate his guts, or is it something else he can't think of?]

[He says it matter-of-factly:]

You're so gentle and in-control.

[Toby fights off the niggling urge to protest he'd never asked for this in the first place. Instead, he shrugs.]

Oh, I don't know about "in-control". You've already seen one of the fledgelings.

[He frowns as he remembers what they'd mentioned of Kanaya at the swear-in.]

One of? How many did you make?

—Why? Does it matter?

Well, I might need to change my assessment of you, won't I? To answer your original question, the vampires I've met have all been so much more, uh - how do I put this - wantonly violent. Only every so often, when they aren't busy quietly brooding. Sudden massacres, that kind of thing. The bloodlust, you know, it gets to them.

[Looking frustrated,]

It isn't like that, all right? ~~[Because other immortals, YAY!]~~ I'm not... I'm not looking to hurt anyone.

[Ah, but has he killed before? Of course, he has, and had even developed a taste for it back then, before he met Dorian.]

To be fair, the only time I'd ever met vampires was when they were attacking me. For the most part.

But, that's why you're different. You're so gentle. Aren't you hungry, Toby?

[That question and variations thereof always seem to key Toby up; this time is no exception.]

...I'm fine, there's no need for that.

[But if Abduxel has already learned to read Toby, he knows that's a lie. So many tells: the way he tenses up, turns his gaze away, tries to avoid that line of conversation...]

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